so i’ll spear you my sucky intros and just show you what popped out of my pool of imagination during class
and of course i am sorry that no one reads this blog and that i am a lousy blogger – there you go --- one bad-ass entrance :)
it says: for all i know, the universe might just be a fucking cube
so, my birthday is getting nearer with each depressing day
there might be the one or other day, when i think it is getting lighter in the dark
these days are marked by him
he for one is the reason why i am happy
and sad
at the same time
so i’ve reached adulthood
why can’t life stop being a moody teenager?
so it was with a yelp that i realized how much this blog actually sucks
for those who had the exquisite pleasure of reading some of it i honestly have to apologize
so much has happened since i have posted the poem and even more since that last more detailed entry
i am sorry indeed
although i still think that this blog isn’t that well read, i do know some people who have looked through it and those are the ones i have let down
please scratch me … hard
the poem i have written in november last year, was on the spur of a pure, splendid and creative moment and it has been long since i last had one of those blasts
it all happened in october, when i started college in graz
believe me, it was one hell of an adjustment
all happened so fast
it was just a question of time when the homesickness would get weaker and the blitheness and excitement of leading a life in an unknown city would kick in
it took me quite some time to get used to living alone
you can imagine how it was
but i’ll spare you the uninteresting little details of how i cooked my first meal in a kitchen that i share with another 40 people or how i read The Time Traveller’s Wife instead of checking out the neighbourhood during my first days as a student
it was a time of unsteadiness and unfamiliarity
when still living with my parents, all i wanted was to get out and explore the world
when given the opportunity to, who would have thought i’d be scared of the unknown
but weeks have passed and finally i can say that i am more than comfortable with my new life
i even started to bemoan my initial reaction
thanks to one person, all i want is to stay put and not move a single inch, for i believe that every step away from them would be one in the wrong direction
first semester is over but the hardship is not
it was nothing like i expected and for that i am thankful
weird
i feel like a totally different person when i look in the mirror though i still look the same
it all just takes some time getting used to
i hope to keep you updated on my life alone
damn
i should have done that some time ago
This world craves for needs
For desire
For peace
It shall preserve what it lacks
For the time might come
When possibilities no more exist
Close your eyes and do not see
Shut your heart and do not feel
Become friends with your useless
Brains
The truth might just be five
Breaths
Inhale
Otherwise no chance for forgivness
And a lot of pointless games
November, 9th 2009
listen for yourself if you are that cool
my very first podcast … you may cheer
and I beg you … please leave me a nice, well-wishing comment.
i will be very grateful --- like forever
ps: can someone please tell me how to upload mp3 in a more convenient way? thanks
I am not perfect and I don't claim to be
And if that's what you wanted
Well then I'm so sorryby Shinedown
i am so sorry that it took me so long this time
plenty has happened since the last time i posted some crap on my even more crappier and pathetic little blog
but i am back. yay
i was wondering, how you guys are doing ... please leave a comment, for then i can hopefully stop wondering my ||| off. hehe
so a lot has been happening lately and that is precisely the reason why i was under the dead for quite a time
listen folks:
i am finally, officially and most importantly legally an adult now
round of applause if you please
so ... one day i was sulking about being still just some teenager with a blog that no one reads and the next day i am a newbie in the oh-so-glorious world of grown-ups with a blog that -again- no one cares to even pretend to read.
so nothing has changed you might think
aha
surprise
me complaining about being 18 for nothing is not all i did the last two months
...
i was learning, reading, studying, preparing, learning by heart, tearing book pages, crying and wishing my teachers minimum wages - just because of my A-level exams
and now i am proud to say: i did it. i nailed it. i excelled. i have my bloody A-levels
sooooo ... what should i do next?
and after loooooooong consideration (i'll spear you the minor details) i've decided to try my best at chemistry (i am aiming for a master in biochemistry, maybe a doctor if possible) and if there is time and strength left a bachelor in english.
what should i say? my two loves - science and language/culture/art
college, here i come
How about a better version of, the way that I am
The way I look, The way I speak,
How about a better version of me
by Shinedown
and i've been busy reading and reviewing a couple of really good dramione-fics on harrypotterfanfiction.com
and i've read the whole twilight-saga, except midnight sun, for the hundredth time, or so
i am sooo excited to finally see new moon hit theatres ... what i've seen from the trailers and sneek previews it looks like tha shite ;)
this, my friends, i have been doing the past two or so months
what where your likes up to?
lemme know
please
i beg you
'cause i have this nasty feeling that really no one is reading this
;(
never mind
love
xoxo
it's been a long time, since i have posted on me wee blog
guys, it was just a hard and busy time, these last few weeks
i had to study for my a-levels and somehow the days rushed by
i've been working really hard, but not just for school ;)
